Kneel Before Zod

General Zod and his badass beardComic book villains are way more bad-ass than the heroes that they’re fighting half of the time. Nobody cares about what some guy with a lot of money and expensive toys is doing to save his city. The real action is almost always with the baddies. Traditionally, supervillains have had horrible disfigurations, weak back stories that lead to their inevitable undoing or some sort of nonsense that makes them stop being “bad” and more “misunderstood.” In the DC canon there is one supervillain who has never stopped being a bearded bad-ass. This guy takes zero crap and does not have time to stand around while Planet Earth fawns over a reporter who changes into his costume in a phone booth. If you’re a comic book fan you already know who Beardilizer is talking about.

General Zod’s out of this world beard honestly dgaf what you think about it or how it is shaped. The villainous beard has been around since the launch of Superman and it’s surely not going anywhere. No, but really, the beard is attached to his face so it’s not going anywhere. While us mere mortals might need a little extra help keeping our beards and moustaches in place while we are fighting our nemesis it’s important to think about all of the work that Zod (or the artists on the various teams that produce these amazing stories) puts into keeping his aesthetic fresh. After all he is a Warlord from Krypton; he has the same powers as Superman and knows that he looks good. He looks so good that he cloned an entire army after him (this is pre-Bizarro). Beardilizer wishes that we could have clones of our boy Greg Perez walking around.

When General Zod (or Dru-Zod, if you’re nasty) was on the silver screen for the first time his beard was nothing if not magnificent. Complimented by a plunging neckline, General Zod took all of our hearts by storm, changing the way that supervillains were portrayed on screen. His lush beard took all focus off of the deep V-neck cut outfit that Dru-Zod suffered through the entire movie. When you’re that much of a badass you can dress however the hell you want. Zod’s beard stayed from movie to movie, carrying over into the cartoon versions of the character. All you beardos know that the power of the bear is strong; there is no resisting.

Over the years, the cartoon version of Zod has always had some sort of bristly situation going on, including some variation of a goatee that looks a bit like the Batman signal. Either way, the beard continues to follow the character through the varying character arcs. Having a beard that works for you is a challenge but when you find that style, you stick to it. Using Beardilizer beard wash and taking a Beardilizer supplement helps our team stay in fighting shape; imagine what it would do for supervillains.